mortality and immaturity

I realized the other day that I am getting older. I heard that a friend from elementary school passed away from cancer last week. It baffles my mind that people my age are dying from sicknesses that grown ups are only supposed to get. I am not a grown up. I mean I have been working day in and day out (minus two stints on unemployment) since I was 18. That is a LONG time! 17 years to be exact. I have a house and a car and a husband and a baby girl and I do grown up things and am responsible for TONS of stuff. BUT, I don't FEEL old. I don't feel like I thought 35 would feel. This brings me around to my thoughts of mortality.

My dad is getting older. Last summer he had some serious kidney issues after surgery and he was in ICU. He was on dialysis for a few months and I was VERY worried. He miraculously recovered enough to get off dialysis. That is almost unheard of. I praised God for his recover. He fell a little after getting off the dialysis and broke his hip. He went through surgery and they put pins in it. While there he had to have another kidney surgery which scared me to death, but he came out OK. He is doing well, but he is about to be 80 in September. That number scares the CRAP out of me. I can't imagine a life without my dad in it. I hear songs or hear stories about people losing their dads and it breaks my heart. I feel so bad for people that don't have their dads. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom and she is such a great person. I would also be lost without her but she is only going to be 69. That is not old. I am not worried about her. I worry that if something happens to my daddy, I won't be able to make it. He is such an inspiring person. He loves everyone unconditionally. He is SUPER forgiving and is such a free spirit. He does not pretend to be something he is not. He is AMAZING. He is a Korean War Veteran, a husband, a dad, a brother, an uncle, a grandpa, a great-grandpa, and a friend in every role that he plays.

He was such a great dad to me and he is a great PawPaw to my baby. Beyond me losing him, I will be devastated for Kendall. I know what it is like to lose a grandparent at an early age. I have absolutely NO IDEA who my dad's mom was. It stinks. They have such a sweet bond and they love each other SO much. I pray every day for him to live forever, and I know that will NOT happen. I just want more time.

Now for the immaturity portion...Life is WAY too short for people to be petty. I heard from a really good friend today that she was having some drama. It is really sad what she is going through and the other person is NOT acting like an adult at all. I feel SO bad for my friend. She did NOTHING wrong and the other person is acting like a 2 year old. I really hope they can work through it because it is causing wounds in multiple other relationships. I wish people remembered how fragile people really are. Even if someone is super tough on the outside, they hurt. They just don't show it. The person that is hurt is so strong, but such a sweet and amazing person and she does not deserve to be treated this way. She was doing something nice and got faulted for it.

Please remember to tell people you love them, don't get angry about petty crap, and remember life is SHORT!!!!!!!!!!!

Here comes the sun...